By Laila Edwards
Portraits by Melissa Fuller
As a peak performance mindset coach in the equestrian world, Nancy Dye likes to joke that she was born into the Witness Protection Program. “After I was born, they took away my name, my parents and where I lived,” she said. “I was adopted. But basically, I was given a whole new identity.” That initial fascination with identity and how it can shape lives has been a guiding force in her coaching journey over the years.
With her lost identity, she gained another. Adopted into a successful and athletic family on Long Island, New York, Nancy grew up with privilege, structure and sports. Summers were spent at her family’s girls’ overnight sports camp in Vermont. It was where she sat on her first pony at age 2, sparking a lifelong love of horses. “Camp was where I learned how to embrace making mistakes and become resilient,” Nancy said.
These concepts were put to the test during her high school years at a prestigious equestrian boarding school in Maryland. While there, she deepened her love of riding, along with her skills in the saddle.
Sadly, during her senior year, her first boyfriend died by suicide. The grief, compounded with years of being abused by a family member, sent her spiraling. “I went from that pain straight into a life of partying and escaping,” Nancy said. “I nearly died from anorexia and addiction.” But instead of letting those challenges break her, she built herself back, turning her adversity to triumph.
Rooted in Horses
From a young age, Nancy learned many life lessons through her horses and the equestrian lifestyle. Her riding days at camp are remembered as days of purpose. “There was a strong expectation of quickly moving up your skill-based goals,” Nancy said. “It was all about showing up and doing the work, even when it was hard or you failed.” That philosophy became a core belief for her.
Nancy primarily trained in hunter-jumpers, though her curiosity led her to explore other disciplines including foxhunting while in Maryland and polo later in life. She always gravitated toward the lesson side of the sport, not the competitive circuits. “I had a low tolerance for boredom, so I was never a fan of sitting around waiting at horse shows every weekend. I was in it to understand, to grow and to challenge myself,” she said. That passion for discovery shaped not only how she rode but how she would later coach others.
She recalled riding with fear in demanding “old school” equestrian programs that felt like training for the cavalry. “You didn’t get to say no. That wasn’t the culture. You rode, you learned and you toughened up. It gave me grit that I draw on even now,” Nancy said.
Even as Nancy’s life shifted through different chapters, from recovery to corporate careers, motherhood and coaching, horses remained a grounding force. “No matter what was happening in my life, the barn was where I re-centered,” Nancy said. “It was the only place I felt completely aligned.” She learned many of her coaching skills simply by spending time with horses and in the saddle.
After many seasons competing at the Winter Equestrian Festival (WEF) in Wellington, Florida, Nancy made the difficult decision to end her riding career. She had been diagnosed with Complex Regional Pain Syndrome (CRPS) and was also battling a disabling case of carpal tunnel syndrome. Though she could no longer ride, horses remained an important part of her life.
Building a Rockstar
Starting in her young adulthood, Nancy was determined to change the direction of her life from addiction to success. She sought therapy, attended recovery meetings and was hospitalized for her anorexia. When diagnosed with hypoglycemia, she focused on changing her diet and lifestyle even more.
As a part of her recovery, she started strength training with John Defendis, otherwise known as Mr. USA, immersing herself in the physical discipline of bodybuilding. But more than the body, it was the brain that captivated her.
“I read every book I could find,” Nancy said. “I studied with the best. I was obsessed with figuring out how to rewire the brain. And I did.” She immersed herself in behavioral science, emotional recovery and human potential; these principles would later become cornerstones of her coaching philosophy.
In her years of discovery, Nancy invested in working with a variety of the top trainers and coaches who opened her mind to the idea of life transformation. Of them, Tony Robbins became her Roman empire for her coaching education. His methods for quickly overcoming fear, breaking negative emotional patterns and accessing peak states of performance spoke directly to Nancy’s mission.
While other industries were embracing life coaching, peak performance training and neuroscience, Nancy noticed an absence in the equestrian world. Athletes in Olympic-level sports were receiving full-spectrum coaching, but riders were largely left to navigate their mental game alone. She wanted to change that.
Identifying a need for strategic intervention, neuroscience-based coding for the brain and identity coaching tailored specifically to riders, Nancy launched her own program, rooted in what she had learned from her studies and coaches as well as from her own transformation. Driven by a powerful quote from Tony Robbins, “We will always remain consistent with who we believe we are,” she embarked upon the journey of transforming identities.
With this foundational principle in mind, Nancy began building a program that would go far beyond standard sports psychology. Her approach wasn’t just about mindset, it was about identity reconstruction and helping athletes become who they needed to be in order to achieve the success they envisioned.
Bridging Corporate to Coaching
Before her full transition into coaching, Nancy had already excelled in the corporate world. Her career encompassed marketing, real estate and even broadcasting as a radio show producer and host. This multifaceted experience gave her business acumen and the communication skills needed to build something sustainable and impactful.
While coaching on the side, before she fully left the corporate world, she had the opportunity to prove what worked best for her clients. By the time she made the full-time transition to equestrian coaching, her brand was already flourishing.
Having balanced horses, business and high performance for most of her life, she understood the issues faced by elite riders, so she could teach from a place of empathy; she was familiar with the drive to consistently transition to higher levels, getting stuck in transition and the pressures they faced in and out of the show ring.
Nancy’s coaching program is unique. Drawing from neuroscience, strategic intervention, military mindset training and behavioral transformation science, she has already changed the lives of many riders and continues to do so. Her program, Equestrian Rockstar Bootcamp, is a 24-session program designed to rewire the rider’s brain, build emotional resilience and establish a confident, unshakable identity in the saddle and in life.
“Technically, I’m not a sports psychologist,” Nancy said. “My program is not talk therapy. I’m here to design and implement solutions; to help riders completely shift who they are. We don’t get our goals, we get our identity. I show them how to lay down a new ‘bridle path’ in the brain and stay on it.”
She works with riders as young as 7 and as experienced as Grand Prix and national champions. She also works with trainers and college teams, like Dartmouth’s NCEA team, which made an historic win shortly after she coached them. “The riders called me just two weeks prior to the competition. I got their mindsets turned around, and when they applied the tools, they won.”
Her book, “Equestrian Rockstars: Solving Your Puzzle for Riding with Confidence and Joy,” captures her method and includes coaching stories, neuroscience principles and exercises used with real clients. But the real magic, Nancy says, happens in the coaching sessions themselves. “The program is customized to the client’s mindset, goals, habits, past, each horse, trainer and riding challenges. No two riders are alike, and neither are their breakthroughs.”
Fueled by Family
Behind Nancy’s intense drive and resilience is a foundation deeply shaped by her family. Her late husband, Jack Miles, was not only an Olympic-level gymnast but also a walking masterclass in high performance and mental fortitude. “He didn’t just teach it, he lived it,” Nancy said. “Even when Parkinson’s disease challenged his body, he never surrendered his mind.” Jack’s discipline, goal-setting obsession and refusal to entertain negativity became a living blueprint for the kind of inner strength Nancy now coaches into her clients.
Their shared life was filled with daily rituals of growth, visualizing, feedback loops and motivational talks over morning coffee. “We were both committed to a mission mindset of staying on a bridle path where we were going to live life as our best selves, every single day,” Nancy said. “He showed me that excellence isn’t an act, it’s a habit.”
Her son, a former captain in the Air Force and currently a COO of a public company, carries forward that same legacy of mental strength and leadership. “Watching him walk across the stage into military service, I saw the embodiment of everything Jack and I hoped to pass on: confidence, integrity and grit,” Nancy said. That family lineage of service, excellence, courage and compassion continues to fuel Nancy’s belief in transformation, not just for riders in the ring, but for the people they are becoming outside of it.
From her first pony ride at a summer camp in Vermont to coaching elite riders to national wins, Nancy has never lost sight of what matters most: who you become along the way. “Being an Equestrian Rockstar, it’s not just about the ribbons,” Nancy said. “It’s about becoming the person your horse can trust, and the person you can be proud of.” With each rider she works with, Nancy isn’t just elevating their performance, she’s transforming the identity behind the reins.
For more information, visit elitelifestyletransformations.com or follow Nancy on Instagram @nancydyemindset
Special thanks to ATG Equestrian; Coastal Girls Co. Palm Beach; Balmain, Palm Beach; Wolf & Badger NY; and Ellsworth by Bethany. Hair and makeup by Philippe Barr and Kyky Mangasa at The Brazilian Court Salon; fashion consultant Lori Weiss.
Photos by Melissa Fuller, melissafullerphotography33.mypixieset.com
